We have had some really good stories here on Dumbass News, and today is no exception. Some dumbass in Hillsboro, Missouri, called police and told them that he was the victim of a roadside robbery and was shot by the bad guys.The dumbass said that he stopped on the side of the highway to help out a guy who needed some help.
The cops called in a team of canines and a police helicopter to aid in the search for the bad guy who supposedly shot the dumbass in question. However, there is more to this story than meets the eye. On the surface this looks like a fairly routine crime. Problem is that it’s a bald face lie! As it turns out, the dumbass shot himself while taking a potshot at a feral cat that was in his yard.
I think I am safe in assuming that the local constabulary was not pleased at having to call in the chopper and the police dogs, at taxpayers’ expense , by the way. Just to show how unamused the police were, after being treated for his wounds, the dumbass was arrested and charge “suspicion of filing a false report”.
You know, I write about stuff like this every day and it never ceases to amaze me how stoopid some people are. Like the dumbass in this post. He’s a fucking idiot. Didn’t the thougth of maybe he’d need a pesky little thing called “evidence” to corraberate his version of events? And how could this dumbass not think about the police doing, you know, an investigation into his claims? Astounding, isn’t it?
I do try to find a silver lining in these dumbass stories and this little tale is no different. Maybe our dumbass should go around Hillsboro wandering through peoples’ yards late at night. Maybe one of those folks willtake a shot at a feral dumbass in their front yard. One can only hope. Dumbass.