Man Shoots Self in His Weenie!

We may have found our Dumbass of the Year for 2011 in this story. We have discovered many oustanding dumbass over the first eight months of this year, but this guy is clearly head and shoulders above the rest. Let me splain.

Instant Vasectomy Instrument

Arizona is one of a select few, if not the only, state that has open carry of firearms for all its eligible citizens. Joshua Seto is one of those citizens. Not long ago Josh and his fiancee decided to go out for a nice supper but things did not go well. You see his fiancee, Cara, also carries a pistol. A pink pistol. Before entering the eating establishment, Josh thought it would be a good idea if he put her gun in the waistband of his pants. Things did not go as planned. As Josh was sliding the pistol into his waistband the the gun discharged hitting ole Josh right smack dab “there”. And by “there” I mean tallywhacker. Ouch! That hurts just thinking about it. Oh, yeah, Joshua was also shot in his left thigh. Forget the thigh. This young man just shot himself in his manhood! I hope he and Cara were not planning to have children. Maybe that’s a good thing as Josh is a major dumbass. A major dumbass without a ding a ling. You. Can’t. Make. This. Stuff. Up.

 A police spokesman said it was not clear if Josh had suffered any permanent damage because of the incident, but the Police Department did issue a statement urging gun owner to (I am not kidding here) to take gun safety classes! A suggested motto for the gun safety classes: “Don’t Be a Dickless Dumbass! Take the State Gun Safety Class!” There’s a rhyme there and everything. It’s a little late for good ole tallywahckerless Josh, but thousands of other Arizonans would be wise to heed this message. I hate to see any more men suffer the trauma that Josh has been through. A penisless life is no way to live. And Josh is only 27 years old, so it’s quite possible that he’ll live the next 50 years or so without the music of coitus coming from his skin flute. That’s really sad, especially if his fiancee is a nympho. Poor Joshua. But let’s look at the bright side of this tragedy. At least Josh still has gazebos…I think.

We can learn a few valuable lessons from this accident. 1) Do not carry a gun with a bullet in the chamber 2) Do not try to slip a loaded weapon into your waistband  3) I would hate it if I shot off my own One Eyed Willie. and 4) It’s a good thing that Josh wasn’t stuffing a .12 Gauge shotgun down his pants.
I wish Josh and Cara the beast and hope he recovers fully from his injuries, with or without a weenie.
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