|New Reader from Arkansas|
Thank you Dumbasses in 117 countries around the world for making the last two weeks the best ever for Dumbass News! I truly believe that because you are a tasteless bastard living in your mother’s basement, or you are a fucking alcohol addled hobo getting free wifi from the library located near your cardboard box “shelter”, it is you that has put this blog in its current
bottom feeding almost lofty status. Then again, it is my brilliant, incisive observations, or as my late Dad used to say, bullshit, that brings us all together. On the hand, your continued support has proven to me that you are an honest-to-God mentally defective degenerate. I say that with love, so hit the fucking Tip Jar (the “Donate” button) in the top right sidebar. I need the money. Shoot me some cheese dammit.
Enough with the touchy, feely shit. Let’s get down to bidness.
As usual for a weekend, here are some oldies but goodies that you or, more likely, the thousands of new Dumbasses that haven’t had a chance to read, in which case you either can’t read or you are too lazy to find the stories on your own.
- Climate Change Causes Mental Illness! Billions will Become Dumbasses! I look at it this way: the more dumbasses in the world the better for me. The more dumbasses in the world, the more I have to write about. And ridicule. And demean, make fun of and belittle.
- Those Wacky Canadians – Beer, pot and hockey. The three things that Canadians are really good at. That and saying “eh”. In this post, a wedding disaster happens and hilarity ensues.
- Dumbass Brit Rips Off, Pisses Off Four Women – Three words: Dumbass. Mother. Fucker. What could possibly go wrong?
One more thing…here’s a Special Dumbass Shout Out to Brenda somewhere in Arkansas. She and I had a nice email exchange regarding a question about one of my posts. Judging by the way Brenda writes and some of the things she wrote in our email conversation, she is definitely Dumbass Worthy. Ooooooooooooooooooooooo pig sooey!!!!!!!