Category: Australia

Cyber Crime Solved by Online Pic of Boobs!

Have You Seen These Hooters?

Certain subject matter draws readers to this blog like a candy store brings in fat kids. If you were to go to the “Dumbass Search” feature located in the left side bar and typed in nekkid, tattoos or boobs, you would come up with the most popular posts this blog has put forth. I have written some outstanding articles dealing with other material, but nekkid, tattoos and boobs are hands down the favorite topics of the Dumbass Horde. I am all for nekkididity and sweater puppies, but tattoos, not so much. Hit up those three links and you’ll see exactly what kind of perverted Dumbasses I get reading my award-worthy filth. You can thank me later.

I am all for nekkididity and sweater puppies, but tattoos, not so much. So for today, boobs it is!

Positive I.D.

Usually when a crime is committed, the bad guy leaves behind some tell tale piece of evidence that leads directly to his identification. You know what I mean…a finger print for example. Some Dumbasses have even left behind their driver’s license at the scene of the dirty deed.

When a crime is committed in cyber space, stuff like an IP address will lead straight to the culprit. That is not always the case, however.

Allow me to elucidate. For those of you in Washington,DC, that means “let me splain”.

The Hacker

Down on the Sinkin’ Sandbar that is Galveston, Texas, is a Meskin Dumbass named Higinio Ochoa. Evidently, Higgy is pretty sharp when it comes to hacking into highly sensitive data bases like those of law enforcement agencies and he did just that to some cop shops Down Under. The Aussie Fuzz was not amused.

After much highly technical cyber sleuthing trying to locate the asswipe that compromised their not for public consumption data, the Australian authorities found their cyber way to an offshoot group of computer hackers affiliated with internet meanies “Anonymous”. this is where Ochoa come and a pair of knockers come in to play.

The Boobs Tell All

As much as I don’t like doing it, I must reproduce a goodly portion of the source article for this post that I found on c|net.com.

“Ochoa allegedly used a Twitter account to direct people to a Web site when all the law enforcement information he’d supposedly hacked was on display.
Also on display was a picture of a woman, her breasts lowering themselves tantalizingly toward the camera, with a sign beneath them reading: “”PwNd by w0rmer & CabinCr3w ❤ u BiTch’s”.
Now CabinCr3w is the apparent name of an Anonymous offshoot. And the “w0rmer” part? Well, the Twitter account linking people to the site was @AnonW0rmer.
However, the photograph of the breasts apparently linked authorities to Ochoa — because, taken with an iPhone, it contained GPS information. The information allegedly suggested she lived in Melbourne, Australia.
Further burrowing led the police to discover a posting on Ochoa’s Facebook page that allegedly revealed his girlfriend was Australian.
The claim is that police have managed to match pictures of her that Ochoa allegedly posted on Facebook to the breast image.”  

Amazing.

Astonished

I have heard of suspects being linked to crimes through DNA taken from cigarette butts, clues obtained from their curb side garbage and even tattoos. But I can say with 100% certainty, that, although I have seen several pair of nice, cuddly sweater puppies, I have never been able to identify a set of heat seeking missiles with nothing more than a cell phone camera photograph.

I am shocked and awed by the industriousness of the Australian cops in finding an exact match of the hooters in question on a small island in the Gulf of Mexico, a half world away. These guys are my new heroes.

I salute you.

As for Ochoa the Hacker, next time take a picture of your girlfriend’s pelvic area tattoo. If you’ve seen one muffin tattoo, you’ve seen ’em all. Unless the muffin is being chased down by the Wizards of Oz.

Dumbass.

Dumbass Cyber Crime Solved by Photo of Boobage! (A Half a World Away!)

Have You Seen These Hooters?

Certain subject matter draws readers to this blog like a candy store brings in fat kids. If you were to go to the “Dumbass Search” feature located in the left side bar and typed in nekkid, tattoos or boobs, you would come up with the most popular posts this blog has put forth. I have written some outstanding articles dealing with other material, but nekkid, tattoos and boobs are hands down the favorite topics of the Dumbass Horde. I am all for nekkididity and sweater puppies, but tattoos, not so much. Hit up those three links and you’ll see exactly what kind of perverted Dumbasses I get reading my award-worthy filth. You can thank me later.

I am all for nekkididity and sweater puppies, but tattoos, not so much. So for today, boobs it is!

Positive I.D.

Usually when a crime is committed, the bad guy leaves behind some tell tale piece of evidence that leads directly to his identification. You know what I mean…a finger print for example. Some Dumbasses have even left behind their driver’s license at the scene of the dirty deed.

When a crime is committed in cyber space, stuff like an IP address will lead straight to the culprit. That is not always the case, however.

Allow me to elucidate. For those of you in Washington,DC, that means “let me splain”.

The Hacker

Down on the Sinkin’ Sandbar that is Galveston, Texas, is a Meskin Dumbass named Higinio Ochoa. Evidently, Higgy is pretty sharp when it comes to hacking into highly sensitive data bases like those of law enforcement agencies and he did just that to some cop shops Down Under. The Aussie Fuzz was not amused.

After much highly technical cyber sleuthing trying to locate the asswipe that compromised their not for public consumption data, the Australian authorities found their cyber way to an offshoot group of computer hackers affiliated with internet meanies “Anonymous”. this is where Ochoa come and a pair of knockers come in to play.

The Boobs Tell All

As much as I don’t like doing it, I must reproduce a goodly portion of the source article for this post that I found on c|net.com.

“Ochoa allegedly used a Twitter account to direct people to a Web site when all the law enforcement information he’d supposedly hacked was on display.
Also on display was a picture of a woman, her breasts lowering themselves tantalizingly toward the camera, with a sign beneath them reading: “”PwNd by w0rmer & CabinCr3w ❤ u BiTch’s”.
Now CabinCr3w is the apparent name of an Anonymous offshoot. And the “w0rmer” part? Well, the Twitter account linking people to the site was @AnonW0rmer.
However, the photograph of the breasts apparently linked authorities to Ochoa — because, taken with an iPhone, it contained GPS information. The information allegedly suggested she lived in Melbourne, Australia.
Further burrowing led the police to discover a posting on Ochoa’s Facebook page that allegedly revealed his girlfriend was Australian.
The claim is that police have managed to match pictures of her that Ochoa allegedly posted on Facebook to the breast image.”  


Amazing.

Astonished

I have heard of suspects being linked to crimes through DNA taken from cigarette butts, clues obtained from their curb side garbage and even tattoos. But I can say with 100% certainty, that, although I have seen several pair of nice, cuddly sweater puppies, I have never been able to identify a set of heat seeking missiles with nothing more than a cell phone camera photograph.

I am shocked and awed by the industriousness of the Australian cops in finding an exact match of the hooters in question on a small island in the Gulf of Mexico, a half world away. These guys are my new heroes.

I salute you.

As for Ochoa the Hacker, next time take a picture of your girlfriend’s pelvic area tattoo. If you’ve seen one muffin tattoo, you’ve seen ’em all. Unless the muffin is being chased down by the Wizards of Oz.

Dumbass.

Don’t Like the Sex of Your Baby? Abort it! (If You Are a Dumbass)

First, do no harm.

This story is about one of the hot-button issues of our time – abortion. Up front let me say that I am Catholic and I stand by the Church’s position on abortion. However, this story, no matter your stance on the subject, is so disgusting and vile, that it has to be one of the worst examples of the abuse of this “right” (coughbullshitcough) that has ever made it to print. If I wrote a blog called Murders of the Year, the couple you are going to read about are the hands down winners and they have a special place in Hell reserved for them.

The two dumbasses in question recently lost a baby girl and decided to try again to conceive another baby hoping to “replace” the infant they lost. At this point, I would normally feel terrible for them at their horrific loss. After, learning what I did, however, I can only pray for the soul of the baby. The monsters that are her parents deserve no sympathy whatsoever beyond losing a precious child, which is something I wouldn’t wish on anyone. The lady got pregnant again, this time with twin boys. One would expect that this would be a double blessing, but not to these Godless dumbasses. Instead of celebrating the miracle of life that was denied them before, the dumbass “parents” decided that they wanted a baby girl, not two baby boys. So what did they do? Like the vermin they are, they aborted the twin boys! They now seek to get a sex specific in vitro fertilization (IVF) in order to have a baby girl! 9Communist China, anyone?) Thank God, the Australian state of Victoria where they live, doesn’t allow for such procedures under these circumstances. But guess what country does? You got it, red, white and blue breath. The United States of America! What. The. Fuck? But that’s another story for another day. Just when you think it couldn’t get any more vomit-inducing, it does. In steps the Australian Press Corps to make you heave even more. “According to the Herald-Sun newspaper of Melbourne, which interviewed the couple, the woman, who is in her thirties, is “consumed by grief over the daughter who died soon after birth” and admits she has “become obsessed with having a daughter and it has become vital to her psychological health.” Obsessed with having a daughter? You think? The bitch needs to be obsessed with finding Jesus, like yesterday. The lady’s husband, whom we’ll call Assmaggot, chimed in with this beauty, “The husband told the newspaper that it was the couple’s “right” to try this route. “It’s ridiculous that sex selection is illegal, actually. For certain circumstances it should be legalized.” I think that in certain circumstances a .45 shot to the skull should be legalized. I’ll be available to do my part should this measure gain legislative approval in Victoria. It gets better, just watch. An Australian pioneer in IVF, Gab Kovacs, chimes in, “I can’t see how it could possibly harm anyone,” he said. “Laws should be made to protect people from things that are going to damage them. Why should we make this illegal? Who is this going to harm if this couple have their desire fulfilled?” Are. You. Kidding. Me? I always thought that if something displeases God, ain’t nobody gonna be happy. I am inclined to think that the Almighty might, just might, mind you, find abortion a bit on the Offensive to God side of the aisle. But that’s just me.

The author of the article piles on with this tripe, “Sex-selective abortions also take place in some places in the United States, though the vast majority of Americans reject the practice as unethical, and because the procedure is often used to destroy female fetuses and preserves males. That the Australia couple targeted their fetuses because they were boys certainly hasn’t mollified American pro-life activists.” Dude, find a state where assisted suicide is legal, I’ll meet you there, asshole. Oh! And fuck you!

If you haven’t eaten yet or have just eaten, you may want to wait to read this crap. Trust me on this one. If you want to read the whole article, click here.

I could go on, but I figured that these pieces of donkey shit people will have to face their maker some day and he won’t be pleased, so I’ll leave the rest of it to Him. Maybe these butt boils will seek redemption and forgiveness from God some day and He, in His infinite mercy, will welcome them into the fold. But I ain’t God and they’ll have to grow wings and fly to escape the scorn that I shall forever heap upon their worthless asses. Fuck them. Dumbasses.