Today’s story is about homos and it doesn’t even take place in San Francisco where the homo lifestyle (WARNING! GRAPHIC HOMO CONTENT AT LINK!) is prevalent and it’s no big deal. As a matter of fact, I don’t have a problem with gay people doing whatever it is that homos do. What two consenting adults do
to each other’s behind closed doors is nobody’s bidness just as long as no children or animals are involved. It’s just that sometimes, like at the link above, homos don’t keep their hiney humping in the privacy of their homes. Now that’s a problem. Same with straight people. Keep all the he-in’ and she-in’ inside. Dumbasses.
Former Celebrity Cruise Lines Waitresses
Homos On the High Seas
Celebrity Cruise Lines recently offered an excursion on the blue waters of the Caribbean exclusively for gay people. Even The Precious People like to gather with like minded folks and just hang out and have a good time while escaping the pressures of every day life. That’s all fine and dandy. But, just like other groups of like minded people, be they Republicans, Democrats, Black, Meskin, hell pick a group, there are gonna be homos who do stoopid shit and give the whole damn lot of them a bad name. This is one of those cases.
The word “buggery” is often used interchangeably with the word “sodomy”, commonly known as “pumping the poop chute”. In some countries this type of activity is illegal. Dominica is one of those places. And guess where the “Fag Flotilla” had a scheduled docking during this cruise? Yep. Dominica. Why a ship full of homosexuals would dock where, by the very definition of being a homo having relations with a person of the same sex, is a mystery to me. But….
Dominican Police boarded the ship and arrested a couple of sissies on suspicion of indecent exposure and buggery. In other words, these two dudes were busted for allegedly having butt sects and could face a fine and/or six months in jail! This sentence seems pretty damn harsh to me, but if the two homos were actually doing the nasty in a public setting, say such as a cruise ship with 2000 other fairies on board, then they have put themselves in a position (no pun intended) where they must face the consequences of their, er, um, “actions”.
Here’s an excerpt of the article found on the HuffingWeeniesTon Post,
“The pastor of Dominica’s Trinity Baptist Church, Randy Rodney, praised the police for their intervention. “I am very pleased that the police were called in and have arrested the people in question. I have warned about gay tourism and its implications for Dominica,” said Rodney, who is a vocal critic of homosexuality and lesbianism.
The presence of gay cruises in the Caribbean has riled several conservative islands including Jamaica and Grenada, where anti-sodomy laws are enforced with strong backing from religious groups.
According to Cruisemates.com, no gay cruise lines sail to Jamaica or Barbados for fear of homophobia and possible violence. It said other places like the U.S. Virgin Islands welcome gay cruises.
In 2010, the Cayman Islands rejected the arrival of an Atlantis gay cruise amid protests from religious groups even though homosexuality is legal on the archipelago.
Don Weiner ( ed. – a guy named “Weiner” working for a homo cruise lines! Now that’s funny!!!), a spokesman for Atlantic Events, referred all questions to Campbell, including why the company organized a trip to Dominica and whether it knew about the island’s anti-sodomy laws.
Elizabeth Jakeway, a spokeswoman for Celebrity Cruises, referred all questions to Atlantis.
What was Celebrity Thinking?
|Celebrity Cruise Lines CEO Company Profile Image|
I’m with the guy who asked the cruise lineswhy in the hell would they take a boat load of queers to a country where queers could be endangered simply for the fact that they (the queers) are gay? Let me ask you this: Would you send Spike Lee and a plane load of other black asswipes like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton to a Ku Klux Klan meeting in Mississippi? I didn’t think so. Instead of a big ding a ling, the people at Celebrity Cruise Lines have their heads up their collectives ass.
Still, if the two busted Rump Rangers are guilty of what they are accused of, then they might want to learn the duties of a Big House Bitch in a Dominican prison. After all, luck favors a prepared mind. I’m just sayin’.
I honestly hope that the two men who were arrested are released without further ado and safely returned home to their friends and family. I also sincerely wish that the People in Charge of Spying on Homo Activities in the Dominican will step forward and expedite the men’s return to the United States. I mena, what the couple is accused of doing in public is certainly out of bounds, getting thrown into a dark dungeon in a foreign prison is a bit harsh if you ask me. Unless these two guys like the whole “Slay the ‘Dragon’ With Your Beefy Sword'” scenario.But that’s another “Fairy Tale” for another gay cruise.
Drunk dumbasses do a lot of stoopid stuff, but this has to be one of the stoopidest ever. At the beginning of the year we had some great candidates for “Dumbass of the Year”, but this idiot is the leader in the Dumbass Club House with barely five months left in 2011. Think about it. The guy got into a control room on a cruise ship and lowered the anchor, for Gawd’s sake! I have never been on a cruise (unless you count cruising the Sonic to Jack in the Box cruise in Irving, Texas in the 70’s) but I am highly encouraged to do so now. It not only sounds like fun, but they must have some killer tequila on board. Or rotgut whiskey. Both are known to, shall we say, impair one’s judgement. Put simply, one, should he or she choose, could get hammered and have all sorts of fun!
Dropping the anchor would be for pikers. As a former Professional Drinker, I could come up with all kinds of “extracurricular” activities that would surely be much more enjoyable than merely dropping the anchor of a moving cruise ship. Strip roulette in the ship’s casino comes to mind. A nekkid drunk guy could sit on the roulette wheel, be spun around bets would be placed on whether his gazebos landed on red or black! Possibly both! Wow, what entertainment and everybody wins! Until the nekkid drunk guy gets dizzy then the game tends to get a bit messy. You have been warned.
I have many more splendid ideas for cruise ship fun that perhaps we’ll discuss in a future edition of Dumbass News. For example, think pineapple rings, nekkid drunk people and ring toss.