|The New Marital Aid?|
Welcome back to the 2011 Dummy Awards, Dumbasses! Moving on to our next Dummy presentation…This Dummy will be going to the Best Performance by a Dumbass, Dead People Division. We had a great year for dead people and dumbasses (unless you were the dead person) in 2011. This category spanned the Dead People spectrum from gubmint fuck ups with dead people to banks and dead people to well, you just name it…2011 was memorable for dead folks all the way around.
The nominees for Best Performance by a Dumbass, Dead People Division are…
The Gubmint and Dead People – This is one of my personal favorites. I always enjoy a good story about what a bunch of dumbasses we have working for our Federal Gubmint. And this tory gives me hope that in the future our grand children will have just as a quality, if not better, of Dumbass working for them a hundred years from now.
Dumbass Shoots, Kills Wife During Sex – I love a good, kinky romance story as much as the next dumbass, but some things are better left undone. I’m just sayin’.
SSA says Lady is Alive. She Says Nothing. She’s DEAD! – More gubmint incompetency as the Sociah Curity Guys try to write a benefit check to a dead woman!
This category of the Dummies was a tough nut to crack. there were several excellent stories to choose form so I can’t go wrong no matter what, but I liked these three the best.
And the winner of the Dummy is….
Dumbass Shoots, Kills Wife During Sex! As weird as it may seem. people die during love making every day. usually it’s some medical condition like a heart attack or aneurism that are the cause of the Big Adios. But our man with the gun here exceeded and excelled in the practice of people keelin’ over while humping. I’ll never see a Dirty Harry movie love scene in the same light again.