Category: Funny Headlines

The 1st Dumbass Newspaper Headlines of 2013!

Ladies and gentlemen and Dumbasses from 154 countries around the globe, it’s time once again for one of the most popular features on Dumbass News!

No, we are not gonna show nekkid lezbean photos of Salma Hayek, Angelina Jolie or Charlize Theron. Get your mind out of the gutter, Dumbass. We show nekkid lezbean photos of beautiful Hollywood starlets on Saturday, not Thursday! Geez.

Although I am great fan of nekkid lezbean photos of beautiful wimmin, what we are gonna do today is another edition of Dumbass Newspaper Headlines!

Let us sally forth…

I’ll be busy that day. While police are busy taking all you Dumbasses into custody, I’ll be on a crime spree of epic proportions.


That must have hurt like hell.


It’s about time. We love hookers here at Dumbass News. We really do. For proof, look here or here.

Maybe it’s illegal to fish for sharks where this guy lives.

It’s also time to spark up the Buffalo Wings.

Bonnie Lewinsky?

Dumbasses.

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