Category: KKK

The Ice Kream Klan Kometh!

The Yankees (Northerners, not the baseball team) have taken over Florida. The conquest is complete. I have proof of this horrific news and today I will share that proof with you, my fellow Dumbasses, no matter how much it pains my Southern-to-the-Core heart. What follows is not for the weak of heart or mind.

The mascot for a small, family owned Ocala, Florida ice cream shop is actually a mascot for the Ku Klux Klan! I. Shit. You. Not. The mascot goes around Ocala and tries to drum up business for the ice cream joint. He has often been mistaken as a symbol for the Klan! I can hear Yankees from all the other places in the USA that they are to subvert screaming in unison, “What does that have to do with us, you bigoted Redneck asshole?” Here’s your answer, you sons of motherless goats, Anti-Southern people dickweeds and representatives of all that is wrong with this great country. Who the hell else besides a dumb fucking Yankee would mistake this for a KKK uniform? See the various colored patches on the “hood” of the costume? What do think that is? A secret Klan colored scheme that signifies the mascot’s rank in the KKK, Local 666? If you’d look a little further, you’d discover that the dude in the costume is a Hispanic type, Puerto Rican to be exact, guy. You know how much those Puerto Ricans love that gay old Klan. The KKK used to use guys like this for target practice or as a preliminary sacrifice while waiting for the real fun to begin when they could lynch a black guy. Believe you me, that if this guy was a Klan plant, the good people of Ocala, Florida would save the County a bunch of money and court time when they finished stompin’ a mud hole in the motherfucker.

So all you “I hate the South, so let’s turn it into New Jersey South since its worked out so well up North” asswipes, you have two choices. 1) Assimilate to your new environs. You might just learn something about caring for your neighbor or taking care of community business on your own, without the need for Federal intervention and lots of other cool shit from Southerners. Choice 2). Move the fuck BACK to New Frakkin’ Jersey, douchebag! Now ain’t that easy?

That’s how they do it in Dixie.

Dumbasses.

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Dumbass Raaaaacist Flashback!

Raaaaacist in Chief

Hello, Dumbasses! It’s the weekend once again and that means it’s time for a Dumbass Flashback! Yes, a Dumbass Flashback, where I spends hours a couple of minutes playing eenie meenie miney moe searching my ass off, looking for stories from days gone by to fill space for your review or, in the case of new readers, first time viewing. I looked for these stories for hours on end damn near a minute and a half to find some stuff that will make you wanna puke excite you and delight you.

So, take ’em or leave ’em enjoy them till you heave to your heart’s content!

The Ice Kream Klan is Coming! – I wrote this piece back in October of 2011. A couple of nights ago I got an email alert that someone had made a comment on it. So I went to check it out and what ensued was comedy gold! Reading the comments from some dumbass Yankee trying to tell me that I am a bigot (a Texas bigot no less!) is flat out hilarious. As you would expect i stomped a verbal mudhole in that pussy boy and had a lot of fun doing so. In fact, it was so much fun, that my wife joined in on it! This is a MUST READ!

Dumbasses and Their Texts – Not only do dumbasses do some really stoopid shit, they text some really stoopid shit, too. There are so many examples of dumbassery that I had to link to the source so you could read ’em all. Prepare to be be laughing your ass off.


If Your Baby Says “Yuck”, He’s a Raaaaacist!– I put this in here in “honor” of the pencil dick commenter  in “The Ice Kream Klan” story who thought he was being so brave by taking me on in a battle of the Dumbasses. The babies that say “yuck” are obviously of Southern Heritage, as no self-respecting Yankee baby would ever say “yuck”.

Like I tell my kids, “That’s what’s on your plate, now eat it or don’t eat at all!”.

Have a great weekend y’all! And remember, you spell “raaaaacist” without 5 “a”s. Take it from a bigoted hick. And the Pencil Dick Commenter.

Dumbasses.

The Ice Kream Klan is Coming!

Puerto Ric-Klan?

The Yankees (Northerners, not the baseball team) have taken over Florida. The conquest is complete. I have proof of this horrific news and today I will share that proof with you, my fellow Dumbasses, no matter how much it pains my Southern-to-the-Core heart. What follows is not for the weak of heart or mind.

The mascot for a small, family owned Ocala, Florida ice cream shop is actually a mascot for the Ku Klux Klan! I. Shit. You. Not. The mascot goes around Ocala and tries to drum up business for the ice cream joint. He has often been mistaken as a symbol for the Klan! I can hear Yankees from all the other places in the USA that they are to subvert screaming in unison, “What does that have to do with us, you bigoted Redneck asshole?” Here’s your answer, you sons of motherless goats, Anti-Southern people dickweeds and representatives of all that is wrong with this great country. Who the hell else besides a dumb fucking Yankee would mistake this for a KKK uniform? See the various colored patches on the “hood” of the costume? What do think that is? A secret Klan colored scheme that signifies the mascot’s rank in the KKK, Local 666? If you’d look a little further, you’d discover that the dude in the costume is a Hispanic type, Puerto Rican to be exact, guy. You know how much those Puerto Ricans love that gay old Klan. The KKK used to use guys like this for target practice or as a preliminary sacrifice while waiting for the real fun to begin when they could lynch a “nigger”. (I despise that word, I use here only to make a point) Believe you me, that if this guy was a Klan plant, the good people of Ocala, Florida would save the County a bunch of money and court time when they finished stompin’ a mud hole in the motherfucker.

So all you “I hate the South, so let’s turn it into new Jersey South since its worked out so well up North” asswipes, you have two choices. 1) Assimilate to your new environs. You might just learn something about caring for your neighbor or taking care of community business on your own, without the need for Federal intervention and lots of other cool shit from Southerners. Choice 2). Move the fuck BACK to New Frakkin’ Jersey, douchebag! Now ain’t that easy?

That’s how they do it in Dixie.

Dumbasses.