Category: Quebec

UPDATE: Dumbass Pressure Pays Off! Big Gubmint Backs Down!

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about a bunch of Sissy Fwench Canadians getting their T-back panties in a wad over a guy’s front yard garden. Here’s a photo of the garden in question:

I am still not sure why, other than the fact that they are Sissy Fwench pussies, these dumbasses were so upset about this garden. I mean look at it! It’s frakkin’ great! I know I’d just hate to have something that disgusting in my front yard. I hope you can see the oozing sarcasm there.

Dumbasses – 1  Sissy Fwench Pussies – 0

The story I wrote about this obvious clusterfuck was the catalyst in forcing these girly men and manly girls into reversing their decision to coerce The Guy to remove his garden. OK, OK. Several thousand Non Sissy Fwench Canadians who chimed in on the deal by notifying the dickweeds who came up with this garden ban in the first place that this would not stand.

Here’s a short article with details on how the Sissy Fwench Canadian Pussies folden like a cheap prom dress:

“Dear Kitchen Gardener,

At the risk of sounding immodest, let me say just this: we ROCK!

By “we” I mean the over 30,000 gardeners who took action over the past three weeks in support of the food garden cause. Together, we helped win not just one victory but two.  The first and most important was the Drummondville front yard garden case which attracted over 30,000 petition signatures, significant international media attention and what seemed to be an endless parade of supportive emails (I stopped counting after the first 200).  Earlier this week, the Drummondville Municipal Council announced that henceforth front yard kitchen gardens will be allowed and have even invited gardeners, Josée Landry and Michel Beauchamp, to help shape the city’s new guidelines for urban food gardens. You can see the news story translated here and Josée and Michel’s blog post here. I am convinced that this victory will prove to be a landmark case that will influence urban agriculture in a positive way, not just in Canada but around the world. So let me join Josée and Michel in thanking you for all your support and good wishes.

And for the frosting on our celebratory cake (carrot, of course), we learned last week that we pulled off a surprising come-from-behind victory in the “Do Good Outdoors” contest thanks to the nearly 1200 people who voted for our entry. We were 3rd out of 115 going into the final day of voting but when the dust had finally settled and all the votes were verified, we finished in 1st place! We’ll use the $5000 prize and the publicity in Good magazine to help plant more school and community gardens. So thank you one and all for helping us and gardens to come out on top!

I hope you’ll join me (virtually or in person) in celebrating these victories and kitchen gardens in general on World Kitchen Garden Day (facebook link) on Sunday, August 26th.  We’ve worked hard and it’s time to party!

Very best wishes,


This, Dumbasses, is what happens when Dumbasses of all stripes come together as one lethal fighting force (metaphorically speaking of course) and challenge the would-be “Masters” of our own destinies. Fuck. Them.

We have, at last count, 1495 Canadian Dumbasses in our numbers. I am certain that they were well represented in the over 30 thousand Dumbasses who bitch slapped the Town Council or what the hell ever they have in Drummondville (the scene of the almost Commie Crime)/.

In addition to the bone-crushing pressure applied by the Dumbass Horde, most of the credit goes to Kitchen Gardeners International  for getting this story out there for the international community to see and respond to. Great job, Kitchen Gardeners!

As your Fearless Leader, I feel compelled and obligated to bestow Honorary Dumbass Status on all who participated in this near-criminal over reach of the Drummondville and set an example of what activism can accomplish when applied with great prejudice on the appropriate person or persons. like Ronald Reagan said, “if you can’t make ’em see the light, make ’em feel the heat”

The city “leaders” of Drummondville felt the heat so intimately that they all have scorch marks on the panties.



Dumbasses Unite!!! Sissy Fwench Canadians Try to Make Front Yard Garden Illegal!

I am pissed off. And this is not a good thing for the offending party. Especially if the offending party is a foreign entity, say, like a bunch of Dumbasses who run a city with all the gusto of your friendly neighborhood dictator. What ‘s even worse is that they are going after a guy’s garden! I am from Texas and there are a few things that the gubmint don’t jack with – a man’s house or land, his family his horse, his awl well, his beer and his garden. If the story I am about to pass on to you happened back home in the Lone Star State, you could expect an armed standoff with the commies trying to fuck with a man’s garden. A drunk, pissed off well-armed Texan is not an adversary one should expect to be very cordial.

To make matters worse, this ordeal is taking place in Canada. In Quebec Province. Drummondville, Quebec, Canada to be exact. In case you had for gotten or are not familiar with Quebec. It is Fwench Canadian. Very Fwench. And hoity toity. Holier than thou kinda stuff. Why do these Dumbasses think they are better than your average Canuck? Because they are of Fwench heritage! Now, I don’t know about you, but if I were of Fwench blood, I would hide that fact like the Ancient Jews hid the Ark of the Covenant. From my perpsective, however, being Fwench is just another reason for me to blast these Dumbass-ois into oblivion. Metaphorically speaking of course.

Gubmint Gone Gonzo

Rather try to explain the deal. Here’s the post in its entirety from :

Earlier this year, Josée Landry and Michel Beauchamp of Drummondville, Quebec planted the front yard of the future: a gorgeous and meticulously-maintained edible landscape full of healthy fruits and vegetables. Now they’re being ordered by town officials to remove most of their gardens (town code states that a vegetable garden can’t occupy more than 30% of the area of a front yard) in the next two weeks to make their yard conform with newly harmonized town code. Front yard kitchen gardens are not the problem; they’re part of the solution to healthier and more sustainable communities.

You wanna see what the pussy town officials are pissing their Fwench panties over?

Sacre bleu!
Bleu Cheese! Blue berries! BTW, did you know that “sacre bleu” means “blue blood” in Fwench? “Blue blood” or “I am Fwench and I am a bitch ass Commie pussy who revels in the misery of others or ruining their lives because I live a miserable Fwench pussy existence”.  I forget which is the  correct definition, but I’ll go with the latter.

The Drummondville town officials are probably all wee wee’d up over this garden because they can’t do something this cool and think that if they can’t do it/have it, then nobody should! I mean, c’mon, what can a Fwench Canadian actually do except be a pussy or a bully? Nothing!

My Ideas

I have a couple of ideas that the gardeners should embrace.

  1. Kill all complaining neighbors. But only if they are Fwench Canadian. Like we say in Texas, “only kill people who deserve killin'”. If that seems a bit harsh, then just send your little girl over to threaten to kick all the male members of the house asses. You’ll see a white surrender flag go up quicker than a hiccup. Remember, Fwench people and their progeny are pussies.
  2. If there’s no legal way out of this bullshit for the Garden Guys, they should have the World’s Biggest Front Yard Garden Veggie and Fruit Sale in the History of Drummondville,Quebec, Fwench Canada, then follow Idea #1. Those pussies still need an ass kickin’.
  3. Follow whatever Dumbass Rules the Fwench Commie Town Officials dictate to you then open up an  Open Air Strip Club in place of the garden that has been removed.Wait. Scratch this idea. It will prolly gain Town Officials’ approval. Still, strippers would be a nice addition to the cucumbers in the garden, if you know what I mean and I think you do.
  4. PETITION: Stop the War on Front Yard Vegetable Gardens Sign that petition. With the full power and wrath of the Dumbass Horde staring those Fwench Knob Slobberers  smack  dab in the eyeballs, they’ll fold like a cheap tent. Or get beat up by little girls.
  5. Move to Texas.

Remember, Fellow Dumbasses: If they outlaw front yard  gardens, then only outlaws will have front yard gardens!

And Town Officials in Drummondville,Quebec, Fwench Pussy Canada can kiss my derriere.