Melbeta, Nebraska. Population 112 in the 2010 Census.
That’s all I know about this tiny town except that it’s located near Scotts Bluff. I have heard of Scotts Bluff. Melbeta? Not so much. Until now. Thanks to two dumbasses and a sandwich.
Not So Quiet
One would think that such a small town would be a very quiet place. I guess it normally is. But all that peace and quiet was recently shattered when a couple, the Spurlings, got into it over the man’s boredom with living in the country.
Things got so heated between the two that somewhere in there a sandwich assault occurred!
The Daily Mail fills us in, “Mrs Spurling is reported to have become bored with the row and made herself a sandwich and returned to the couple’s bedroom – where he allegedly followed her.
The argument is then alleged to have become physical, with Mr Spurling accused of pulling his wife’s hair, pushing her down on the bed and rubbing the sandwich into her face.
Mr Spurling’s wife is reported to have had mayonnaise stains on her shirt when examined by the police.
She apparently told officers she had washed mayonnaise from her face and hair before they arrived at the property.
Mr Spurling, who denies the charge against him, was found lying face down on grass outside the couple’s home, according to the Scotts Bluff Star- Herald.“
All Righty Then
It has been a pleasure exposing this sub assault and further showing what a drunk Dumbass and a sandwich can do for a small town’s standing in the Community of Man, while at the same time serving you a steaming pile of the premier poop you’ve come to expect from this blog.
Besides, the chick should have used mustard. Nobody uses mayo on a bologna sandwich. Those who do, suffer.