It’s happened to me a hundred times. And it’s probably happened to you as well.
I am talking about patronizing the drive thru at a joint like McDonalds, placing your order, paying for it only to get home and find out that you have been short changed an order of fries or something. So, whaddaya do? You go back to The Arches and retrieve the stuff you should have been given in the first place and maybe get a coupon for a free Big Mac redeemable on your next visit to McD’s. Or you simply eat (pun intended) the price of the forgotten item.
This got me to thinkin’, “What if something like this were to happen to a bank robber?” Actually I didn’t think that. It’s just my way of segueing into today’s Dumbass News. Clever, huh?
We have done stories about bank robbery before including this one about a guy that knocks off a bank then brags about it on Facebook! There’s also the one about the idiot that tried to disguise himself by putting underwear on his head and the Dumbass who robbed a bank and took a getaway bus in order to escape! But today’s story may top them all.
Picture yourself in Syracuse, New York. Or if you’d rather not, I understand. But Syracuse is where this story takes place, so deal with it.
Anyway, 1001 James Street in Syracuse is home to Alliance Bank. It is also the site of one of the stoopidest crimes in Syracuse annals.
Twenty-eight year old Arthur Bundrage was out of crack cocaine one day when he got a great idea. “Today is a great day to rob a bank!”, he thought. So Arthur moseyed on over to the aforementioned Alliance Bank at 1001 James Street where he promptly walked in and demanded $20,000 in cash from one of the bank’s tellers. The teller refused. Again, Arthur ordered the teller to fork over the 20 large. This time bank employee relented (maybe Arthur said “please”) and crammed some cash into a bag and handed it over to Arthur. Arthur then split the scene. The bank called 911.
This story doesn’t end here, however.
So Arthur pulled the bank job, left the scene of the crime, the cops have been notified and are on the way to the bank and what does the Dumbass do? He looks at his ill-gotten gains and determines that the bank teller did not give him the full 20 grand that he demanded. It is at this point that we find out that Arthur Bundrage is about as smart as a spit wad.
Unsatisfied with his haul, Arthur heads back into the bank to get the rest of the $20,000! He got there about the same time the cops did.
He was arrested without incident.
***Hat tip to and photo courtesy of syracuse.com***