goofing off doing my usual due diligence, feverishly searching the internet for a suitable topic for today’s story until I finally found what I thought would be entertaining. By “feverishly searching”, I mean “seeing what I could rip off from HuffPo”. And of course by “entertaining” I mean “stoopid as hell”.
I succeeded on both counts. I ripped something off from HuffPo and it’s dumb as a box of Liberals.
Today’s stories involve affairs of the heart – that intangible, wonderful and oft-frustrating thing we call amore.
|Shot Through the Heart|
Love. It’s a helluva deal.
Being in love is hard work. Not unlike a job. The time, commitment, dedication and sacrifices one makes for the sake of love require a lot effort and discipline. Some folks are good at love, some ain’t. On Dumbass News, we could give a shit about people who have found a soul mate. We want the kind of Dumbasses whose love life is a train wreck. Screw happiness. We want misery.
Baby, You’re the Bomb….Threat
Christopher Shell was on a plane headed for Dallas when all the sudden the flight was ordered back to its point of origin. The jet taxied its way to that little tunnel thing that goes from the airport terminal to theplane so the passengers can get aboard the aircraft.
This is where the SWAT Team comes in. And guess for whom they are looking? Yup, our man Chris.
It seems that Shell’s ex-girlfriend has called authorities to notify them that Chris Shell was carrying liquid explosives on the plane! Chris was SWATed, cleared of the charges and was allowed to continue on to Big D.
The call from Chris’ ex was a hoax! She and her new boyfriend were taken into custody soon after the incident on the plane.
Would You Buy a Used Car from This Woman?
When British shock jock Tim Shaw speculated on-air that he would leave his family for pin-up girl Jodie Marsh, he didn’t suspect that his wife Hayley was listening. Mrs. Shaw sought revenge in the form of an auction for his $45,000 Lotus Esprit Turbo sports car via eBay, as its registration was in her name. Not only did she sell it in 5 minutes, she let the luxury vehicle go for a mere 50 pence (90 cents). (from yourtango.com)
Hell hath no fury…
Ahhhhh love. Ain’t it grand?