Category: Twinkies

Guy Steals Delivery Car, Finishes Deliveries, Goes to Jail

This past Friday political conservatives from all over the internet staged a “buycott” of Papa John’s Pizza. This was in response to political liberals’ boycott of Papa John’s because of the pizza giant’s plans to cut many full time employees’ hours to part time and to outright discharge other workers due to the looming implementation of Obamacare, or as I call it, “a big steaming pile of yak shit”.

Regardless of your position on the impending health care law, you have to admit that you have not yet heard of a single theft of a Papa John’s delivery guy’s automobile during this event. Even in Connecticut. Bipartisanship at its finest.

The same can not be said for a Chinese Food Delivery Guy in Connecticut.

GTA Gai Pan

Some poor schlub in Connecticut was going about his bidness of delivering Chinese food to the hungry folks of Hartford when he did something stoopid. The Schlub was making a delivery to Bristow Middle School. When he went inside to deliver the food, he left his car running! This was all the opportunity that Keith Hinds needed.

Keith jumped in the idling car and hauled ass. And by “hauled ass” I mean he went on to continuing to deliver the remaining orders on The Schlub’s route! He evidently intended to keep all the cash he was collecting from the deliveries.

The cops were called and the restaurant also called the remaining customers on the route notifying them about what had happened. It was then that one of the customers reported to the restaurant that his food had already been delivered! By the car thief! At this point the jig was up.

The cops easily located Hinds and put him under arrest.

Upon taking him into custody, you’ll never in a gazillion years believe what the cops found in Keith Hinds’ possession. Drugs – a joint and an anti-psychotic. Oh, yeah, and a crack pipe. Knock me over with a feather.

Election turmoil with possible voter fraud, the death of Twinkies and now this.

Our country is doomed.



Twinkies: Death By Dumbass


Twinkies are dead! Long live Twinkies!

One of the most talked about stories on the internet yesterday was the tale of the death of Twinkies. And Ding Dongs. And Ho Hos. And Wonder Bread. And several other brands of bread like Nature’s Pride ®, Merita®, Home Pride®, Butternut®, and Beefsteak®. 

Hostess’ closure means that it will also shut down 33 bakeries, 565 distribution centers, approximately 5,500 delivery routes and 570 bakery outlet stores throughout the United States. 


Simply put: The Bakery, Confectionery, Tobacco Workers and Grain Millers International Union (BCTGM).

Here’s why: The Genius Leaders of the BCTGM decided to call a strike against Hostess, which of course is their right. But the time to go on strike was not so good. You see, Hostess was in the middle of reorganizing under Chapter 11 Bankruptcy! I’m not a Genius Union Leader or a bidnessman, but it is my understanding that trying to coerce more  money and even better benefits from a company undergoing bankruptcy proceedings is not a particularly sound strike stategy. But what do I know?

Did I mention that the Union was asked to take an 8% pay cut while Hostess was reorganizing? I was told through a reliable source that his neighbor, a Hostess employee, would take a pay cut from $18 an hour to somewhere around $16 per hour! Oh! The sacrifice! Hostess says that their last best offer to the Union was made in September! From the Hostess website, Hostess Brands is unprofitable under its current cost structure, much of which is determined by union wages and pension costs. The offer to the BCTGM included wage, benefit and work rule concessions but also gave Hostess Brands’ 12 unions a 25 percent ownership stake in the company, representation on its Board of Directors and $100 million in reorganized Hostess Brands’ debt.

Bottom Line 

The end result of all this lunacy is that 18,500 Americans are out of a job and Hostess Brands, Inc is kaput. All thanks to 5000 members of the BCTGM and their corrupt, greed-infested Genius Union Leaders, who by the way still have jobs! The Main Genius Union Leader at BCTGM knocks out in the neighborhood of a quarter million dollars a year in salary and benefits. At least he’ll have a nice holiday season.

You put your faith in a bunch of Jackass Union Thugs and you got what you asked for. 13,500 other non-BCTGM Hostess employees, including many in my hometown of Irving, Texas, also got shit canned because you and your “leadership” got what you asked for. Oh, yeah! There are at least 23 million other unemployed Americans that would love to have a job paying ten bucks an hour, much less $16 an hour plus benefits. Now you’ve joined them in the unemployment line. Nice.

I take no joy in writing this post because I hate to see bad things happen to my fellow Americans. It just pisses me off that so many good people were led astray by and will suffer because of a few assholes (read: Genius Union Leaders) who have their heads so far up their rectums they can count the polyps on their colons.